#13 the “this is bullsh*t”- parameter

One of the things I’ve learned about my sensitivity and have seen with people having difficulty with it too, is a lack of “till here and no further” attitude. Sensitivity and sympathy often go hand in hand and as long as there is an inability to discriminate the difference between empathy and sympathy, many of us end up doing stuff we don’t really want and/or like. For no particular reason (ahum – read on and see for yourself) I remember one of my first lectures on sensitivity for a group of very kind people. Somehow I got the idea of putting the attending people to the test and opened the lecture with something like this:

Good evening everybody, my name is Edwin and tonight I would like to talk about sensitivity.

I know.. nothing special so far, just a nice very common introduction.

We will have a break around 9PM tonight for approx. 15 minutes in which you have time to drink a cup of tea of coffee. Then we continue with the second part of the evening. It is not allowed to take any drinks in the conference room, please be aware of this! 

I want to tell you not to ask any questions during the lecture, this is often quite disturbing to me and chances are I will answer them further up the lecture anyway. 

Warming up here, it’s getting even better!!!! Continue reading “#13 the “this is bullsh*t”- parameter”

#12 when sensitivity doesn’t make sense

Scroll the internet and you will most likely get overwhelmed with the “Let’s come together and talk about being over the top incredibly sensitive” groups. They have problems with sensitivity, they love it, they say it empowers and others tell you how it drains the life out of them. Sensitivity is HOT! Let’s all be sensitive woohoo. I am shocked with all the nonsense and craziness going on and perhaps, I’m just way too sensitive for all that sensitivity going around.

My eyes fell out of their sockets when I read a post from a lady that, at about 1:30 AM, posted “I’m drowning” publicly on Facebook. That post was followed a few hours later with “nobody cares, this group sucks, you are all fake” and that kind of harassment you may aspect from a sensitive person. Ok, I admit, I’m in that group too but mostly for the pure curiosity of who, what & why.

Anyway, back to the lady in dire need of a life-vest, or should I say, feeling sorry for herself. At some point, her post got some replies with a general context of; “it was freaking night, I was sleeping” (mmm.. good point!)  to Continue reading “#12 when sensitivity doesn’t make sense”

#11 Empaths need bigger egos

Ego is bad.. BAD!!! Very very bad! Many spiritual minded people will tell you this in very convincing ways. Ego is like a bad disease and you need to get rid of it in order to be happy. The reality is; you can’t get rid of it! And here’s my go at it. First of all; ego is not bad! But more importantly, you also need it to be able to function at all in this society. Ego is a protection mechanism if you allow it. Ego helps you to balance between and appreciate what life offers you. Ego is not too bad at all!

The problem rises when there is not a need to be met, but an emptiness to be filled

In a black and white world, the ego is about serving self, while the empath is being sensitive and loves to serve others. The question that rises then is: why would the empath so greedily like to help and serve others? Is it a pattern, an unselfish act or strange behaviour? Is it truly because of unconditional love or is Continue reading “#11 Empaths need bigger egos”

#10 doing and being done

I feel very passionate about spirituality and love to contemplate on various aspects of life and how they influence me. That is; until real life kicks in! Karma, for instance, is quite a bitch and it sounds like this exotic spiritual concept but in reality, it can be a very painful experience. Karma, in easy language, is sort of like; doing and being done. You do something, and at some point in time it comes back to you and it hits you straight in your face. Smack!!!!

There are many ways this can actually happen. Sure, there’s the do good receive better. But that’s not the challenging one. Then there is the stuff where you at some point in time do something out of dishonesty towards yourself. Now this is really a difficult one which I will explain a little bit: at some point in time I wasn’t happy with my relationship, with my work.. well, with nearly everything. I broke up and moved away, or shall I say, run away. It was an escape because Continue reading “#10 doing and being done”